What should I say to someone when their loved one dies?
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This post was sourced from submitted reader questions and posted by wikiHow Editorial Staff, based on our article: 17 Comforting Things to Say When Someone Passes Away.
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Most of the time a person that's going through grief just wants a safe space to express themselves. I'd offer them a chance to share what they're feeling and let them know that you're there for them anytime they need. Tell them, "It's okay not to feel okay."
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One of the best things you can say or write is to share a memory of the person who has died. Instead of adding to the chorus of “I’m sorry for your loss”— you can say, “I’m so sorry for the loss of your dad. I want to tell you about my strongest memory of him — I remember him picking me up after school in eighth grade and taking me out for ice cream. I'll never forget the way your dad cared for me.”
Sharing memories is a gift — it lets people know their person made a big impact.
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Sharing memories is a gift — it lets people know their person made a big impact.
It’s helpful to start by recognizing their loss, then you can ask them how they’re feeling, and if there’s a specific way in which they would like to be supported. Some people may want to talk about their loss, and others may not.
It may be helpful to share memories of the person who has passed, if the person wants to, and it also might be helpful to engage in a ritual, such as going to visit their grave or going to places they used to love. Just remember that this is up to the person who’s experienced the loss and what kind of support they prefer.
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It may be helpful to share memories of the person who has passed, if the person wants to, and it also might be helpful to engage in a ritual, such as going to visit their grave or going to places they used to love. Just remember that this is up to the person who’s experienced the loss and what kind of support they prefer.
When comforting someone after the death of a loved one, focus on expressing sympathy and offering your support. Keep things simple and sincere, and let them know you’re there for them. Here are some examples of things to say:
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- “I’m so sorry for your loss. They were an amazing person.”
- “I can’t imagine what you’re going through right now, but I want you to know I’m here for you.”
- “I’m so sorry this happened. I’m here to support you with any help you might need.”
- “My deepest condolences. They were such a wonderful person, and I feel lucky to have known them.”
- “I’m thinking of you during this difficult time. If you need someone to talk to, I’m here.”
I feel so bad, I'm so sorry and I'll defiantly help! Make them feel comfortable and say I'm so sorry for what happened I really care about you and I know and understand how difficult this is don't worry I'm here for you whenever you need me and give them a hug, I am so deeply sorry for what's happening I really hope and whish things get better!
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