What are the secrets to make a long distance relationship work?
Me (19) and my bf (18) have been dating for 2 years, he is moving a few states away this summer to go to college, and we want to try long distance, but we've never done it before and aren't sure how to make it work. What are your tips for making a LDR thrive?
View hidden comment
wikiHow forums are moderated for quality. Learn more about our moderation policy here.
Submit Answer
We are lucky to have the technology today that allows us to stay close in a long distance relationship. To continue to foster intimacy in a long-distance relationship, regularly check in over Zoom or WhatsApp to update each other on what's going on in your life.
Basically, think about how can you use technology to maintain your connection and understand each other's needs. If you can meet from time to time physically, that would also be great. But each person needs to understand what they need to do to overcome distance and simply have a healthy communication, and to express those needs to one another while maintaining healthy dynamics and positivity.
View hidden comment
Basically, think about how can you use technology to maintain your connection and understand each other's needs. If you can meet from time to time physically, that would also be great. But each person needs to understand what they need to do to overcome distance and simply have a healthy communication, and to express those needs to one another while maintaining healthy dynamics and positivity.
I'll call my long distance boyfriend during my commute (20 minutes)! It's nice to get to hear his voice every day, and it's convenient because I wouldn't have been doing anything else anyway, besides listening to music or maybe a podcast.
View hidden comment
I'm in a long-distance relationship and a practice that has helped us not miss each other so much is sending each other messages whenever something makes us think of the other! Like if I'm burning a candle that he gifted me, I'll send him a picture of it and a text like "Thinking of you <3 Love this scent sooo much!!" And we do that throughout our days. It's nice to know that he's thinking of me often, and I'm sure he appreciates that I'm thinking of him often.
Oh and if something is bothering you, talk about it right away!! It can be easy to let things slide when you're long-distance but doing so will make you resent each other in the long run
View hidden comment
Oh and if something is bothering you, talk about it right away!! It can be easy to let things slide when you're long-distance but doing so will make you resent each other in the long run
Check in with each other regularly! And I don't just mean talking about what happened during your days. Set aside time to talk to each other about how long-distance feels, what is/isn't working about being so far apart, and how your relationship is going overall. If you can, have these chats over video call as opposed to a phone call or even text, because that helps with the communication. It's harder to read nonverbal cues when you can't see or hear your partner, so it's easier for misunderstandings to happen.
View hidden comment
I'm not going to sugarcoat it...long distance relationships can be hard. You can't really replicate physical intimacy when you're so far apart, but that doesn't mean you can't make it work! My girlfriend and I tried to be intentional with fostering emotional intimacy while we were long-distance. We would use conversational card games to spark deep and connecting conversations.
Also, it's nice to hear from each other regularly. Try to interact every day, even if it's just a quick text. And involving each other in mundane, everyday things kind of simulates being near each other. For example, if she goes clothes shopping she might ask me to pick between options for her, or we'll sit on a video call together while we're both working or cooking so we can exist in the same space together, albeit virtually. You got this!
View hidden comment
Also, it's nice to hear from each other regularly. Try to interact every day, even if it's just a quick text. And involving each other in mundane, everyday things kind of simulates being near each other. For example, if she goes clothes shopping she might ask me to pick between options for her, or we'll sit on a video call together while we're both working or cooking so we can exist in the same space together, albeit virtually. You got this!
What’s on your mind? Ask anything.
Get advice and feedback from experts and wikiHow readers just like you.
Ask a Question
