105 Big Nose Jokes to Crack Up Your Friends

Are you looking for funny jokes about big noses that aren’t mean-spirited? If so, you’ve come to the right place! This article gives you 105 jokes, one-liners, and roasts that are clever, silly, family-friendly, and more. We’ve even put together a list of funny words for big noses, so you can come up with a few quips on your own! Just remember, if someone is uncomfortable when you tell a joke about big noses, it’s best to stop making them around that person.

Best Big Nose Jokes

How does a dog with no nose smell? Awful.
Did you hear the joke about the big nose? S’not funny.
What do you call an adult male who picks his nose? The boogeyman.
Why do gorillas have big nostrils? Because they have big fingers.
Pinocchio hated his nose… but it grew on him.

Section 1 of 9:

Clever Big Nose Jokes

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Poke fun at a majestic nose with a classic joke. Anyone with a big nose probably feels like they’ve heard every joke out there about an oversized schnozz. That just gives you the opportunity to surprise them with one of these clever jokes about big noses:
- What does a nosy chili pepper do? Get jalapeño business.
- Why is your nose in the middle of your face? Because that’s the scenter.
- Did you hear about the giant who got a nosebleed? It was all over town.
- My friend was accused of lying about how big their nose became when they sneezed, but they blew it all out of proportion.
- What did the handkerchief say when it saw the big nose? Everybody take cover, she's going to blow!
- What do you call a guy with a big orange nose? Nothing, he has enough to worry about.
- What did the boss say to his big-nosed employee? Your nose was on time, but the rest of you was fifteen minutes late.
- How does a dog with no nose smell? Awful.
- What flies and has a giant nose but can’t smell? An airplane.
- What do protestors and people with big noses have in common? Neither is afraid to picket.
- What do you call a man with a big nose who can predict the future? Nostrildamus.
- What did the doctor say when he saw your giant nose? I’d hate to see the grindstone.
- Everyone knows about Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer, but have you heard of Harold the Brown-Nosed Reindeer? He’s just as strong and flies just as high. But he can’t stop as fast.

Section 2 of 9:

Silly & Light-Hearted Big Nose Jokes

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Keep it light with a silly joke about big noses. Sometimes it’s hard to separate teasing from bullying. When you’re joking about someone’s nose, it’s best to keep things as light-hearted and silly as possible. Here are a few examples of silly jokes about big noses to give them a gentle ribbing about their honker:
- Did you hear the joke about the big nose? S’not funny.
- You know what they say. Big shoes, big nose, big hands… probably a clown.
- What did Dr. Frankenstein say when Pinocchio’s nose started to grow? IT’S A LIE!
- What did the big nose say to the small nose? I’ve got more scents than you.
- Why did the player with the biggest nose feel sad at football practice? They didn’t get picked.
- Why did Pinocchio’s nose get bigger every time he went to sleep? Because he was lying for hours.
- What do you give a sailor with a big nose and a cold? An anchor chief.
- Why do people with big noses make good detectives? They can sniff out a clue from a mile away.
- I was baptised by a vicar wearing a big fake nose and sunglasses. It was a blessing in disguise.
- What’s worse than having a big nose? Having a big nose and tiny fingers.
- How would you describe someone who tells nose jokes all day? Someone with a big scents of humor.

Section 3 of 9:

Short Big Nose Jokes

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Get a quick laugh with a short and snappy big-nose joke. When you’re sharing any kind of short joke, timing and tone are everything. Keep your energy up and try not to rush so much that they can’t understand what you’re saying.^{[1]
X
Research source} Try out one of these big nose jokes to get a fast chuckle:
- What do you find inside a big nose? Big fingerprints.
- What do you call an adult male who picks his nose? The boogeyman.
- Why are people with the biggest noses the happiest? They get picked for everything.
- What did my friend say when I told him he had a big nose? S’not nice.
- How did the dog smell after he rolled in the mud all day? With his nose.
- What’s a big nose’s favorite book? S’not a mystery.
- How do you measure the strength of a smell? In scentimeters.
- How do you stop an elephant from smelling? Tie a knot in his trunk.
- Why was the big nose exhausted? It had been running all day.
- Why are big nostril jokes inappropriate? They’re too on the nose.
- Who wrote the definitive book on big nose jokes? Hank R. Chief

Section 4 of 9:

Family-Friendly Big Nose Jokes

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Share a big nose joke that’s fun for the whole family. Kids love jokes, too! But when you’re telling kids jokes about big noses, it’s best to avoid making fun of any real person. Even light teasing might upset a young person. Here are a few fun nose jokes that everyone can enjoy:
- What did the big nose say to the finger? Stop picking on me!
- What’s the best thing about having the biggest nose in your family? You’re the first to know when dinner’s ready.
- What comes out of a big nose at 200 miles per hour? A Lambo-greenie.
- Why was the man with the big nose so sad about his feet? He smelled them everywhere he went.
- Did you hear what happened to the kid who almost won the biggest, snottiest nose competition? They blew it in the final round.
- Why can’t your nose grow to 12 inches long? Because then it would be a foot.
- Why do horses have big nostrils? So they can pick their nose with hooves.
- Why do gorillas have big nostrils? Because they have big fingers.
- Why did the snowman end up with a big nose? He picked it himself.
- What do you call an elephant with an extra-long nose? A smellaphant.
- What do you call a person with a big runny nose on top of Mt. Everest? A mountain slimer.
- What’s the worst part about having a big nose? The birds that are building nests in your nostrils.
- Did you see the movie about the person with a big nose who disappeared when they sneezed? It’s based on atchoo story.
- What’s a big nose’s favorite cookie? S’not gingerbread.
- Why did the person with the big nose win a comedy award? They had a great scents of humor.

Section 5 of 9:

Big Nose Jokes for Adults

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Tell a racy big nose joke that’s for adults only. When you’re hanging out with a group of adults, you might be looking for a joke that’s a little edgier. In the world of edgy (or blue) humor, nothing is off limits.^{[2]
X
Research source} Just remember to keep it friendly when you try out one of these more risqué big nose jokes:
- Having a big nose is a terrible excuse for not wearing a face mask. After all, I wear pants.
- A giant nose walks into a bar and asks for a drink. The bartender says, “Sorry, I can't serve you. You're already off your face.”
- What’s the different between a big nose and a butt? Nothing. They both smell, and you wipe between the cheeks when they get runny.
- What’s the difference between an a*-kisser and a big brown-noser? Depth perception.*
- What did the waiter say to the guy with the big nose? Pardon me, sir, some of the ladies have asked if you wouldn't mind putting that thing away.
- Why are elephants' noses so big? So they can scratch their butts.

Section 6 of 9:

Big Nose One-Liners

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Make them snort-laugh with a quick one-liner about big noses. A one-liner is the ultimate snappy joke. It often uses puns and wordplay to get a double meaning across in as few words as possible.^{[3]
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Research source} Use one of these big-nose one-liners… or let them inspire you to create your own:
- I tried to feed my pet aardvark some ants today, but he turned up his nose.
- With a nose like that, every kiss is long distance.
- Excuse me, is that your nose, or did a bus park on your face?
- Your nose is so long, when you scratch it, you get frequent flyer miles!
- You must love birds so much to give them such a nice place to perch.
- You can pick your friend, and you can pick your nose, but you can’t pick your friend’s nose.
- Laugh and the world laughs with you. Sneeze, and it’s goodbye Seattle.
- I once saw a person with a nose so big they had to pay a toll to pick it.
- You know, it’s not the size of a nose that's important, it's what's in it that matters.
- Your nose is like WiFi—always picking up signals from miles away!
- Pinocchio hated his nose… but it grew on him.

Section 7 of 9:

Big Nose Roasts

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Roast your friend’s prominent nose with a friendly joke. Just remember, when you roast someone, it’s meant to be playful and affectionate. So, make sure to use a friendly tone when you use one of these big nose roasts:
- Your nose is so big that people think it’s raining when you sneeze.
- Your nose is so big, I bet you can smell the future.
- Does your nose influence the tides?
- Your nose is so big that when you float on your back, people think you’re a shark.
- It must be nice to wake up in the morning and smell the coffee… in Colombia.
- Your nose is so bad you can smell your own ear!
- Your nose is so big you can smell a fart coming.
- You could de-emphasize your nose if you wore something larger, like Wyoming.
- Your nose is so big that you can go bowling with your boogers.
- Your nose is so big that people run for cover when you blow it.
- When you stop to smell the roses, are they afraid?
- Your nose is so big, other noses rotate around it.
- Who mows your nose hair?
- Your nose is so big, you could use it as a jet pack when you sneeze.
- Your nose is so big that when you’re lying down, we use it as a sundial.
- Your nose is so big that when you’re lying, no one can tell.
- Your nose is so big that it has its own zip code.

Section 8 of 9:

Jokes & Puns about All Noses

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Drop a joke or pun about any size of nose. One way to take some of the sting out of your teasing is to tell a joke or make a pun about noses in general instead of big noses. Here are a few jokes and puns that are about any and all noses:
- My sister says I’m being immature. I guess she isn’t getting her nose back.
- I was going to tell you a joke about my nose… but I just sniffed out a better one!
- If my nose runs… should I catch it?
- They say everybody picks their nose, but I was just born with mine.
- What did one eye say to the other? Between you and me, something smells.
- I have 4 noses, 10 eyes, 20 legs, and 6 fingers. What am I? Ugly.
- What’s the best way to keep a skunk from smelling? Hold its nose.
- Snowmen like carrot cake because it tastes like boogers.
- How can you tell which vegetables are snobby? They turnip their noses.
- What do you call a man with no body and no nose? Nobody nose.
- Have you ever wondered why noses run and feet smell?
- I’m a clown… and everybody nose.
- What insects smell the best? Deodor-ants.
- Why don’t anteaters ever catch colds? Because their noses are full of anty-bodies.
- What did one snowman say to the other? Do you smell carrots?
- What do you get when you pick a pig’s nose? Hamboogers.
- My mom told me picking my nose is disgusting… so now I have to do it myself.
- Where does a nose go to work? Down at the ol’ factory.
- There are 2 types of people in this world. Those who pick their nose and liars.
- Why did the nose become a supermodel? Because it had a great scents of style.
- What do you find up a ghost’s nose? A BOO-ger.

Section 9 of 9:

Funny Words for Big Noses

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Use a fresh and funny word to refer to a big nose. There are several words and slang for a big nose (or any nose) that are funny on their own. Sprinkle a few of these hilarious words for noses into your conversations to show your sparkling wit:
- Schnozz^{[4]
  X
  Research source}
- Schnozzola
- Beak
- Neb
- Snoot
- Schnozzle
- Snout
- Honker
- Smeller
- Sniffer
- Snot locker
- Booger cave
- Muzzle
- Smell holes
- Booger factory
- Blow horn

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Warnings

Make sure to pay attention to your friend’s reaction to the jokes. If they seem uncomfortable, stop making jokes about their nose to avoid hurting their feelings.

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