This article was co-authored by Cole Imperi and by wikiHow staff writer, Cheyenne Main. Cole Imperi is a certified Thanatologist and the Founder of the School of American Thanatology based in Los Angeles, CA. With over 17 years of experience, her mission is to help people explore their relationship with death, dying, grief and loss so they can get the most out of life. Cole is a 2-time TedX speaker focusing on shadowloss and resiliency, and is the author of the book A Guide to Grief, for teens and tweens. Cole has been featured on the Netflix series The Future of… and in The Atlantic, The New York Times, Ologies, Marie Claire, USA Today, and more. She also writes the popular column Grief or Madness and consults on bereavement programming for organizations.
There are 7 references cited in this article, which can be found at the bottom of the page.
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When someone passes away, it can be devastating for those left behind. Sending a short condolence message to a friend can be a meaningful way to show you love and care about them. It’s not always easy to find the right words when someone’s going through a difficult time—that’s why we’ve compiled a list of simple phrases you can send your friend in a text message or a sympathetic card. We interviewed clinical therapist and social worker Joseph Phillips to see how you can write a supportive condolence message and show your friend you’re thinking of them.
Steps
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1Send your friend a card with a personal and heartfelt message. Signing a sympathy card can be a meaningful way to show you care and let your friend know that you’re thinking about them.[1]
If the two of you are close, check in on them later with a call or a thoughtful text message.
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- “I hate to see you hurting but know it’s part of the healing process. Take all the time you need. Love you.
- “We’ve been friends through thick and thin—just know I’m here no matter what.”
- “I am sharing in your sadness as you remember your loved one.”
- “Wishing you all the peace and comfort possible.”
- “Caring thoughts are with you during this difficult time.”
- “You are not alone, I am here for you.”
- “Gone, but never far from our hearts. Deepest sympathy for your loss.”
- “Sending over my most heartfelt sympathy to you and your family.”
- “Losing someone so close is so hard. I will be here to support you. Sending you love.”
- “Sharing in your sorrow and here for you in the days ahead.”
- “Be kind and gentle with yourself. Take your time and know that you have my full support.”
- “Thinking of you and sending my love during this difficult time.”
- “Deepest condolences to you and your family for your loss.”
- “Sending you hugs and comforting thoughts.”
- “Words cannot express how saddened we are to learn of your loss. Please take your time. We are all here for you.”
- “Wishing you feelings of comfort, moments of peace, and memories of joy during this difficult time.”
Expert Q&A
Video
Tips
Expert Interview

Thanks for reading our article! If you’d like to learn more about communication skills, check out our in-depth interview with Joseph Phillips.
References
- ↑ Cole Imperi. Certified Thanatologist. Expert Interview
- ↑ Joseph Phillips. Clinical Therapist, MSW. Expert Interview
- ↑ https://www.countryliving.com/life/g32179146/sympathy-quotes/
- ↑ Joseph Phillips. Clinical Therapist, MSW. Expert Interview
- ↑ https://www.goodhousekeeping.com/life/a40119939/condolence-messages/
- ↑ https://www.helpguide.org/articles/grief/helping-someone-who-is-grieving.htm
- ↑ Joseph Phillips. Clinical Therapist, MSW. Expert Interview
- ↑ https://www.helpguide.org/articles/grief/helping-someone-who-is-grieving.htm
- ↑ https://time.com/5118994/advice-for-helping-grieving-friend/