How to Get a Virgo Man Back: 11 Tips to Reconnect

Get a Virgo man to fall for you all over again with this helpful guide

Co-authored by Annabelle Reyes Reviewed by Stina Garbis

Last Updated: January 6, 2025 Fact Checked

Virgo men (born between August 23 and September 22) are kind, methodical, and attentive in relationships—no wonder you’re looking to reconnect! If you’ve gone through a breakup with a Virgo man or just haven't heard from the Virgo guy you've had your eye on in a while, you're in the right place. Read on for a complete list of tips to help you learn how to get him to miss you and want you back, with expert insights from professional astrologer Stina Garbis.

Getting a Virgo Man Back

Give him space and let him come to you.
Engage in your favorite activities and focus on self-improvement.
Send him a gentle, friendly text.
Try to build a friendship with him first.
Talk to him about what went wrong in your relationship.
Show him that you're ready to learn, grow, and change for the better.

1

Be patient and give him space.

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Right after the breakup, consider using the “no contact rule.” Virgo men are methodical and analytical, so they usually need a lot of time to think things over and come to conclusions they feel good about.^{[1]
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Research source} If you’ve just broken up, try dropping all contact for a couple of weeks—the distance will allow him time to process his negative feelings about the breakup and get in a better headspace.
- If the two of you had a fight right before breaking up, this also gives him time to cool down. “Virgo’s pride themselves on being the critic and being right, but if they push you away after a fight and you disappear for a week, the regret will grow. They like to be right, but they just want to tell you, and for you to change, not actually leave,” explains Garbis.^{[2]
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- However, there’s a difference between giving him space and deliberately playing hard-to-get. If he sees you flirting with other people, he might not understand and assume that you’ve moved on.
- Practical Virgos don’t like to play games, so remember, you’re taking time apart to allow him to think through things, not to make him jealous.
- Plus, if a Virgo man is open to reconnecting, a little much-needed space will give him time to miss you. When you reach out again, he could be eager to reciprocate!

2

Keep busy and take care of yourself.

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Virgo men are impressed by people who can maintain their stability. While you consider how to reconnect with your Virgo man, focus on self-improvement instead of stewing over the relationship. As hardworking earth signs, Virgos are known for being self-sufficient and constantly bettering themselves, so they definitely appreciate these qualities in partners.^{[3]
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Research source} If he sees that you can be put-together and have a busy, fulfilling life, both with and without him, he may be more likely to want to reconnect.
- When you go through a breakup, it can be tempting to let the sadness affect your cleanliness or hygiene habits. However, Garbis says that these things are especially important to Virgos, so do your best to keep up with them.^{[4]
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- While it’s important to take care of yourself for your own sake, the extra benefit is that it will impress your Virgo man. He'll be impressed if he sees that you're handling the breakup with resilience and grace!
- Social media is a great tool for keeping him in the loop, even when you’re not reaching out to him directly. Post pictures and keep your status updated—it will show him when you’re doing well and moving forward, and make him wish to be part of your life again.

3

Send him a thoughtful text, but keep your distance.

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After you’ve given him some space, it’s time to recapture his attention. Try sending him a text without getting too emotional in your message, and wait for him to respond before texting him again. If he’s feeling inclined to reconnect with you, then he’s already thinking about you constantly—so give him just enough contact to show him that you’re thinking about him, too.
- Although Virgos feel things very deeply, they tend to appreciate logical, direct communication, rather than overly emotional displays. They like “honesty and availability,” explains Garbis.^{[5]
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- Beyond this, text messages aren't the best place to bring up heavy thoughts or gush about how badly you miss him. Instead, use gentle and friendly texts to show him that you miss him (and make him miss you, too).
- For example, you could start with something simple like, “Hey, it’s been a while. How have you been doing?” or “I passed by the park today, and it made me remember those picnics we had. Hope you’re doing well :)”

4

Figure out your emotions independently.

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A Virgo man won’t know how to juggle your feelings and his own. These earth signs crave stability and they’re very grounded people, so they won’t respond well if you approach with chaotic energy or indecision.^{[6]
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Research source} Take the time you need to move past the breakup, process your negative feelings about it, and make sure reconciliation is what you want. If you talk to your Virgo man once you’ve had some time to collect yourself, he’ll be more inclined to hear you out.^{[7]
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- For a Virgo man to feel ready to reconnect with you, he’ll need to see that you can process your emotions separately from him and that you’ll let him do the same.
- That doesn’t mean you need to recuperate on your own! Use friends and family to form a support system that you feel good about.

5

Be his friend first.

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Friendship is an important step in reconnecting for Virgo men. As mutable signs, Virgos are good at changing and evolving, but they prefer to do this in a slow, methodical way.^{[8]
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Research source} This means he likely won’t want to go from 0 to 100 if you’re getting back together—he’ll want the two of you to take your time and make sure it's the right thing to do. Before you reconnect romantically, show him that you can be a reliable friend, without romantic expectations getting in the way.
- Give him a simple invitation to hang out at first. You could say, "How about we get together for a cup of coffee sometime this week? I'd love to catch up with you."
- Virgo men tend to maintain a cool and composed appearance on the outside, but make no mistake: he still cares. He may still have a lot of feelings for you and only needs time to sort them out.^{[9]
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6

Talk to him about your relationship.

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Discuss what went wrong in the relationship and how to fix it. If your Virgo man believes there are still issues to figure out in your relationship, you’ll likely need to have a serious conversation before reconnecting. Virgos are ruled by Mercury, the planet of communication and the mind, so they love talking things out and analyzing the situation from all angles.^{[10]
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Research source} Remember, practicality is the name of the game here, so try to bring up past issues in a matter-of-fact way.
- Remain calm when talking about past problems, without expecting (or forcing) him to apologize right off the bat.
- Go over what went wrong, and keep the conversation oriented around a more hopeful goal of fixing those issues for the future.
- Keep in mind that Virgos are known for being a little bit critical and perfectionistic, but this doesn’t come from a place of judgment. They just see everything (including relationships) as puzzles to solve and perfect.^{[11]
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- So, if you're hoping to reconnect, Garbis says “This boils down to how easily a Virgo is willing to forgive, and how much you are willing to put up with a Virgo’s standard.”^{[12]
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7

Show him that you’ve changed.

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As mutable signs, Virgo men value flexibility and adaptability. Conflict can drive you two apart, but an earnest commitment to change and progress can reverse the damage. A Virgo man will only think that reconnecting is a good idea if he can see a solution to the problems you had—and if you show him that you’re ready to learn, grow, and put those solutions into action.
- If you apologize for past issues, back up your words with actions; a Virgo man also believes that actions speak louder than words. Figure out how you're going to handle such problems in the future and tell him about it.
- If he's upset that you're always late, set alarms so that you start showing up on time. If he felt you were noncommittal about the future, make a five-year plan.
- When a Virgo man wants to reconnect, his actions will prove that he’s been working on himself too. Virgo men have high standards for their partners, but they hold themselves to the same standard!^{[13]
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- Reader Poll: We asked 762 wikiHow readers what self-improvement activity they’re most motivated to do, and 53% said working on their physical and mental health. [Take Poll]

8

Be polite and kind.

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Virgo men value respect and good manners. They’re known for being incredibly conscientious, and their deepest desire is to be helpful to others.^{[14]
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Research source} It’s important to show him that you’re compassionate and respectful, both in terms of your relationship with him and the way you interact with other people. If your Virgo man needs some extra convincing that you’re the one for him, show him your empathetic side, and chances are he’ll be eager to reconnect with you!
- More broadly, he also wants a partner who is just as kind and considerate to everyone else as they are to him. Tip your barista generously, hold the door for someone who needs a hand, or even do some volunteer work.

9

Pay attention to the details in his life.

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Virgo men are extremely observant and detail-oriented. Speak his language and show him that you can remember the little things when it comes to your relationship: how he takes his coffee, the music he likes to listen to when he’s stressed, or how he likes to organize his books. He’ll be eager to reconnect with someone who can recognize and understand the minute details in his life.
- If you’re building a friendship or actively working toward reconnecting in a romantic way, try doing something thoughtful for him.
- For example, if you know that he works the late shift on Thursdays, offer to cook dinner for him that night. Or, if you come across a new book by his favorite author at a book shop, consider surprising him with it.
EXPERT TIP

Stina Garbis
Psychic Astrologer
Reverend Stina Garbis is a Psychic Astrologer and the Owner of Psychic Stina. With over 30 years of experience, she specializes in providing personal and professional advice through astrology and tarot card readings. Reverend Stina has experience working with high-profile celebrities, sports figures, politicians, and CEOs. She has been featured in many publications, including Bustle, Vice, The New York Post, and Readers’ Digest and she also has a 200k+ following on TikTok. Stina holds an Ordained Minister License from The International Metaphysical Ministry University Seminary.

Stina Garbis
Psychic Astrologer

There are a few things you can do to attract a Virgo man. First, prioritize cleanliness and good hygiene—they want you to smell and look good. Be smart and witty, but still let them mansplain from time to time, and be a good listener. A brainy girl-next-door type of attitude may get them going.

10

Make yourself available and reliable.

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Show your Virgo man that you’re there for him. Garbis explains that Virgos are more receptive signs, which means they aren’t always comfortable taking charge and going after you.^{[15]
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Stina Garbis
Psychic Astrologer

Expert Interview} Once you’ve spent some time building your connection again, it’s a good idea to be as present and available as possible, so he knows you’re serious about this.^{[16]
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- You don’t need to be pushy or insert yourself into his life too much; just be responsive when he reaches out, and let him know that you’re always there for him.

11

Tell him what you want.

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Virgo men can be insecure in matters of the heart, so take the initiative. If you want to reconnect with him, make sure that you tell him exactly what you want—and reinforce those words in your actions.^{[17]
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Research source} Knowing where you stand may help him get over his insecurity and take the plunge into a romantic relationship with you again.
- There's a time and place to get emotional with a Virgo man. Wait until he is sending signals that he's ready. If he's spending time alone with you again, making lots of eye contact, mirroring your body language, or even touching your hand, it may be a good time to tell him how you feel.
- It’s okay if he doesn’t feel the same. Be happy if you’re able to reconnect with your Virgo man, but try not to despair if it doesn’t work out. There’s a whole world full of people and possibilities for you to explore!

How Do You Get a Virgo To Open Up To You?

Connect & Flirt with a Virgo Man with this Expert Series

Virgo men are loyal, driven, and slow to open up. These expert articles will help you attract and date the Virgo of your dreams.

1

Flirt with a Virgo Man

2

Flirt with a Virgo Man over Text

3

Know if a Virgo Man Is Pushing You Away

4

How to Get a Virgo Man Back: 11 Tips to Reconnect

5

Make a Virgo Man Miss You

6

Attract a Virgo Man on Social Media

Expert Q&A

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Question

Will a Virgo man reach out first if he wants you back?

Jessica Lanyadoo
Astrologer & Psychic Medium
Jessica Lanyadoo is a Humanistic Astrologer, psychic medium, and animal communicator with over 30 years of professional experience. Known for her grounded and accessible approach, she helps individuals cultivate emotional intelligence and navigate life with clarity. She is the author of Meditations for Your Sign (2025) and Astrology for Real Relationships (2020) and hosts the acclaimed podcast Ghost of a Podcast. Her work has been featured in CNN, The Today Show, Rolling Stone, Vogue Italia, Time Magazine, Oprah Magazine, and more.

Jessica Lanyadoo

Astrologer & Psychic Medium

Expert Answer

They might, but the odds aren't particularly high. Virgo is an intrinsically introverted sign, and they tend to be really reflective and considerate. As a result, they tend to be a little more quiet and prone to keeping things to themselves.

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Question

Will a Virgo know if I'm trying to flirt with them?

Jessica Lanyadoo
Astrologer & Psychic Medium
Jessica Lanyadoo is a Humanistic Astrologer, psychic medium, and animal communicator with over 30 years of professional experience. Known for her grounded and accessible approach, she helps individuals cultivate emotional intelligence and navigate life with clarity. She is the author of Meditations for Your Sign (2025) and Astrology for Real Relationships (2020) and hosts the acclaimed podcast Ghost of a Podcast. Her work has been featured in CNN, The Today Show, Rolling Stone, Vogue Italia, Time Magazine, Oprah Magazine, and more.

Jessica Lanyadoo

Astrologer & Psychic Medium

Expert Answer

Maybe not right away, but Virgos will absolutely notice if you're being subtle, coy, or playful. They're very observant, so they'll eventually pick up what you're putting down.

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