135+ Hilarious Popsicle Stick Jokes for Kids

Popsicles are one of our favorite tasty treats—and they're even more fun when they include a joke on the stick! Want some popsicle stick-worthy jokes, without having to eat 100+ popsicles? We've got you covered! Keep scrolling for a long list of the best popsicle stick jokes for kids (and a few for adults 👀), plus fun facts about the history of popsicles.

Our Favorite Popsicle Stick Jokes

How does a thread get to school? A spool bus.
Where do spaghetti and sauce go to dance? A meatball.
What do frogs do with paper? Rip it, rip it.
What did the horse say after it tripped? "Help! I’ve fallen and I can’t giddy-up!"
How do you make an egg roll? You push it!
What’s red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

Section 1 of 8:

Silly Popsicle Stick Jokes

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These jokes are classically corny—and undeniably hilarious. What gets a kid more energized than a sugary sweet treat? Laughing their butt off to the punchline of a cheesy joke, of course! Like these:
- What kind of clothes do frogs wear?
  - Jumpsuits.
- Why couldn't the strings ever win?
  - They could only tie.
- How does a thread get to school?
  - A spool bus.
- Why did the soccer player hold his boot to his ear?
  - Because he liked sole music.
- Why does a quarter flip higher than other coins?
  - It has an eagle on it.
- What crew mans a haunted ship?
  - A skeleton crew.
- What’s the hardest thing about learning to ride a bike?
  - The pavement!
- How did the telephone propose to his girlfriend?
  - He gave her a ring.
- How did the computer catch a fish?
  - With its internet.
- Why can’t you play soccer with pigs?
  - They hog the ball.
- What kind of pets does a band have?
  - Trumpets.
- Why didn’t the cashier laugh at the customer's joke?
  - It made no cents.
- Where do dogs hate to shop?
  - The flea market.
- What do golfers love to drink?
  - A cup of tee.
- Where do you put barking dogs?
  - In a barking lot.
- What do pigs and ink have in common?
  - They both go in a pen.
- Why are frogs rarely angry?
  - They eat whatever bugs them.
- Where does an elephant keep its suitcase?
  - In its trunk.
- What is a musician’s favorite pastry?
  - A drumroll.
- What do you call a square that’s been in an accident?
  - A WRECKtangle.
- What position do ghosts play in soccer?
  - Ghoulie.
- What did the sink say to the potty?
  - You look flushed.
- Why did the baseball player get arrested?
  - He stole second base.
- Where were pencils invented?
  - PENCIL-vania.
- What did the triangle say to the circle?
  - You’re pointless.
- What do lawyers wear to court?
  - Lawsuits.
- What do you call a crocodile that likes to bowl?
  - An alley-gator.
- Why was Cinderella so bad at soccer?
  - She kept running away from the ball!
- What did Mr. & Mrs. Hamburger name their daughter?
  - Patty.
- What do icicles say to each other when leaving?
  - Bye-cycle.
- How do billboards talk?
  - Sign language.

Section 2 of 8:

Popsicle Stick Dad Jokes

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Or should we call them "pop" jokes? 🤔 Dad jokes are cringeworthily hysterical—as comedian Manual Garavito explains, the joy in a solid dad joke comes from "the innocence of it. A good dad joke feels like it comes from someone who cares—like a father figure being playfully silly. It’s not imposing or edgy; it’s more like, 'Here’s a sweet little joke I thought you’d enjoy.' That’s the spirit of a dad joke—gentle, innocent, loving."^{[1]
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Expert Source

Manuel Garavito
Comedian

Expert Interview} We agree, and we compiled a few dad jokes we think fit the bill:
- How do pigs communicate?
  - Through swine language.
- Why did the teacher jump in the pool?
  - To test the water.
- What event do spiders love to attend?
  - Webbings.
- Where do cows go for entertainment?
  - Moo-vies.
- How can you defend yourself under water?
  - Carry a sword fish.
- Where do spaghetti and sauce go to dance?^{[2]
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  - A meatball.
- What type of frog has horns?
  - A bull frog.
- What was the wolf in the butcher’s shop arrested for?
  - Chop-lifting.
- What kind of tree would have the best bark?
  - A dogwood.
- What do you do when your fish sings flat?
  - Tune-a-fish.
- Why do fish live in saltwater?
  - They wouldn’t want to live in pepper water!
- What kind of bird is always sad?
  - A bluebird.
- What do you get from a pampered cow?^{[3]
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  - Spoiled milk.
- What did the horse say after it tripped?
  - "Help! I’ve fallen and I can’t giddy-up!"
- Why did the girl eat her test?
  - Her teacher told her it was a piece of cake!
- What did the beach say when the tide came in?
  - Long time no sea!
- What do you call cheese that isn't yours?
  - Nacho cheese!
- What is a snake's favorite subject?
  - Hisssss-tory.
- How do trees go on the internet?
  - They log in.
- Where do baby cows eat lunch?^{[4]
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  - The calf-eteria.
- What do you call a well-balanced horse?
  - Stable.
- What do you call a canine that lives at the beach?
  - A hot dog.
- What is a knight's favorite fish?
  - A swordfish.
- What is a rabbit's favorite type of music?
  - Hip-hop.
- What do you call a frog that's illegally parked?
  - Toad.
- Why can’t you hear a pterodactyl going to the bathroom?
  - Because the “P” is silent.
- What do you call an angry carrot?
  - A steamed veggie.
- Why do cows wear bells?
  - Because their horns don’t work.
- What do you call a pile of cats?
  - A meow-ntain.
- What kind of call does a marathon runner always make?
  - Long-distance.
- What's black and white and red all over?
  - A skunk on a trampoline.
- What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet?
  - Supplies!
- What’s the difference between a poorly dressed man on a tricycle and a well-dressed man on a bicycle?^{[5]
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  - Attire.
- Why is a bad joke like a dull pencil?
  - It has no point.

Section 3 of 8:

Short Popsicle Stick Jokes

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For when you're short on laughs and short on time. Let's be real, most popsicle stick jokes have to be short. Otherwise, how would they fit on the stick? Still, these brief jokes are shorter than others (for when you're in a really, really big hurry):
- Why are calendars so popular?
  - They have a lot of dates.
- What do you call a magician that loses his magic?
  - Ian.
- What kind of bird writes letters?
  - A pen-quin.
- What would bears be without bees?
  - Ears.
- What’s red and bad for your teeth?
  - A brick.
- Why kind of bug is in the FBI?
  - A SPY-der.
- Why are doctors always calm?
  - They have a lot of patients.
- Where does a polar bear keep its money?
  - In a snow bank.
- Which side of a duck has more feathers?
  - The outside.
- What is a cat's favorite dessert?
  - Pie à la meow.
- How do you make an egg roll?
  - You push it!
- What trick did the load of bread teach the dog?
  - Roll over.
- What’s Forrest Gump’s password?
  - 1forrest1.
- What do you call two elephants talking?
  - A heavy discussion.
- Which building has the most stories?
  - The library.
- What is a cow's favorite activity?
  - Going to the mooooo-vies.
- What’s the most expensive kind of fish?
  - A gold fish.
- What do frogs do with paper?
  - Rip it, rip it.
- What did the fish name his kid?
  - Gill.
- Where was King David’s temple located?
  - Beside his ear.
- What do elves learn in school?
  - The elf-abet.
- What did one toilet say to another?
  - You look flushed.
- What does corn say when it gets a compliment?
  - Aw, shucks!
- What runs but never walks?
  - A river.
- What lights up a soccer stadium?
  - A soccer match.
- Why did the little girl put her bicycle to bed early?
  - It was two-tired.
- Where does a catcher sit down for dinner?
  - Behind the plate.
- What do computers eat for snacks?
  - Micro-chips.
- What is a duck's favorite snack?
  - Quackers.
- What’s small and red and has a rough voice?
  - A hoarse radish!
- What kind of phones do turtles use?
  - Shell phones.

Section 4 of 8:

One-Liner Popsicle Stick Jokes

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These quick quips are clever and giggle-worthy. So, really, one-liners don't tend to appear on popsicle sticks, which typically break the joke up into, y'know, two lines—the question on one end of the stick, and the answer on the other. But we've included some popsicle stick joke-esque one-liners here anyhow, because they're just so corny, kooky, and silly:
- RIP, boiling water. You will be mist.
- Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.
- I’m reading a book about anti-gravity. I can’t put it down.
- I lost an electron. You really have to keep an ion them!
- I was wondering why the frisbee kept getting bigger and bigger, but then it hit me.
- I went to buy some camo pants but couldn’t find any.
- I ordered a chicken and an egg online. I’ll let you know what comes first.
- I failed math so many times at school, I can’t even count.
- Two clown cars collided with each other last night. Over 50 died.
- I used to have a handle on life, but then it broke.
- I heard there were a bunch of break-ins over at the car park. That is wrong on so many levels.
- Don’t you hate it when someone answers their own questions? I do.
- I told him to be himself; that was pretty mean, I guess.
- When life gives you melons, you might be dyslexic.
- My wife told me to stop impersonating a flamingo. I had to put my foot down.
- A cheese factory exploded in France. Da-brie was everywhere.
- A bossy man walked into a bar and ordered everyone a round.
- I can’t believe I got fired from the calendar factory. All I did was take a day off.
- I'm not lazy, I'm just on energy-saving mode.
- People who use selfie sticks really need to have a good, long look at themselves.
- I quit my job at McDonald’s yesterday. Turns out, my boss was a real clown.
- I told my friend 10 jokes to make him laugh. Sadly, no pun in ten did.
- We also asked Garavito his go-to corny one-liner, and he offered up this gem: "I know a joke about lions, but if I told you, I’d be lyin’."^{[6]
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  Expert Source
  
  Manuel Garavito
  Comedian
  
  Expert Interview}

Section 5 of 8:

Popsicle Stick Jokes for Adults

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Hey, adults like popsicles too. If you're an adult with kids (or you just grew up eating way too many popsicles), you've probably heard jokes in the vein of "orange you glad I didn't say banana?" a million times. But if you've still got a craving for some good, ol'-fashioned dumb jokes, we've compiled a few more ~mature~ options:
- Why did the weatherman’s cheeks turn pink?
  - He saw the climate change.
- How did the police catch the naked man breaking into Zales?
  - They grabbed him by the jewels.
- What is a prize old people can win for aging?
  - Atrophy.
- Why couldn’t the lizard get a girlfriend?
  - Because he had a reptile dysfunction.
- Why did the ranch blush?
  - He saw the salad dressing.
- What’s the secret to having a smoking hot body in old age?
  - Cremation.
- I have an addiction to brake fluid, but I can stop whenever I want.
- I want to die peacefully in my sleep like my grandfather, not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car.
- Our child has a great deal of willpower—and even more won’t power.
- I know they say that money talks, but all mine says is "Goodbye."
- Light travels faster than sound, which is the reason that some people appear bright before you hear them speak.
- I always take life with a grain of salt. And a slice of lemon. And a shot of tequila.
- It takes a lot of balls to golf the way I do.
- My therapist says I have a preoccupation with revenge. We’ll see about that.
- Most people are shocked when they find out how bad I am as an electrician.
- The problem with kleptomaniacs is that they always take things literally.
- My father has schizophrenia, but he’s good people.

Section 6 of 8:

Where can I buy popsicles with jokes?

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We wish there were a clearer-cut answer here, but it seems as if whether you get a popsicle with a joke on the stick is sort of up to chance. On October 25, 2019, Popsicle's official Twitter account tweeted in response to a customer's confusion about not finding jokes on her popsicle sticks: "The jokes do not appear all the time—if the plant runs out of the sticks with jokes on them they use plain sticks." So if you buy a box of Popsicles and there aren't any jokes on the sticks, it could just be that they ran out of sticks with jokes on them.

Section 7 of 8:

Fun Facts about Popsicles

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1
Popsicles were (accidentally) invented by an 11-year-old boy. Yup, you've got child entrepreneur Frank Epperson to thank for the iconic dessert. Way back in 1905 in San Francisco, Epperson mixed sugary soda powder with water and mistakenly left it out overnight. Because it was cold, the mixture froze, and in the morning, Epperson discovered his brilliant invention.^{[7]
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- He dubbed the treat an "Epsicle" (a portmanteau of "Epperson" and "icicle") and began selling it around his neighborhood.
- The treat grew in popularity, and he applied for a patent in 1924, though his children eventually convinced him to change the name to "Pop's 'Sicle," or a "Popsicle."
- "Popsicle" is technically a brand name, though other versions of the treat exist; generically, the dessert is often called an "ice pop," but many people use the term "popsicle" to refer to ice pops generally (sort of like how we often refer to tissues as "Kleenexes," even if they're made by another brand).
2
In Australia, they call popsicles "ice blocks" or "icy poles." There are different names for popsicles all over the world! Here are some of our favorite alternative names for the classic summertime treat:
- United Kingdom and Ireland: ice lolly, lollipop, lolly
- Philippines: ice drop, ice candy
- India: ice gola
- Thailand: ice cream tang
- Australia: ice block, icy pole
3
Most popsicle sticks are made from birch wood. When Epperson patented his tasty creation, he included in his patent recommendations for the best wood to use for the stick, including wood-bass, poplar, and birch.^{[8]
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Research source} Birch is the most popular type of wood used to make popsicle sticks today. Why? It's strong, smooth, and safe to use for food-grade purposes.