How do you ask a girl to be your girlfriend?
I have gone on a few dates with a girl and I really like her. I think things are going well, and I want to ask her officially to be my girlfriend, but I feel so awkward about it! How do you approach that topic? What do you say? And when is the right time? Are 3 dates enough before asking someone to be your gf or is that too soon?
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I recommend being direct, but also giving the person a way out and making them feel comfortable. You don't want them to feel like they have to automatically say yes just to make you feel good, because you want the truth. You don't want somebody to just tell you, “oh yeah, I'd like to continue the relationship too”, only for them to disappear because they didn't feel like they could have that conversation directly. The best way to do it is give them a safe way out so they feel like they're not hurting your feelings by telling you. You could say something like “You know what, I have enjoyed getting to know you and getting close to you. I'd like to be in a relationship because I can see this going far further, but I wanted to get an idea from you on where you're at. And if you don't feel the same way yet, that's okay too, because I just want to understand where you're at” and approaching it in a low-key way so they don't feel like you're expecting them to say one particular thing.
You can also try just opening up the conversation without saying how you feel first. You could say “Hey, I'm just curious– how are you seeing things for us right now? Are you looking for a long-term thing? Are you just like having fun and just want to see where it goes? I'm just curious to know what your thoughts and intentions are”, that's a natural, easy way to give somebody a way to be honest, where they won't feel like they're hurting your feelings either way, but it will tell you what you need to know.
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You can also try just opening up the conversation without saying how you feel first. You could say “Hey, I'm just curious– how are you seeing things for us right now? Are you looking for a long-term thing? Are you just like having fun and just want to see where it goes? I'm just curious to know what your thoughts and intentions are”, that's a natural, easy way to give somebody a way to be honest, where they won't feel like they're hurting your feelings either way, but it will tell you what you need to know.
It is common that people choose to hide their feelings because they want to avoid conflict and rejection at all costs, but doing this sabotages your chances at happiness. If you want a serious relationship with this girl, you see something in her that opens your heart and feel like she's someone you could share your life with, then you need to take action instead of letting it slip through your fingers.
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Be as open and forthright as possible when asking a girl to be your girlfriend. Say something like, "Hey, I really like you, and I think things are going well between us. Would you be my girlfriend?" She'll probably appreciate your directness!
As for when to ask, waiting until you've gotten to know her and gone out a few times is reasonable. You want to get a sense of how compatible you are and make sure you're ready to commit before making things official. It sounds like you have done that, so best of luck!
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As for when to ask, waiting until you've gotten to know her and gone out a few times is reasonable. You want to get a sense of how compatible you are and make sure you're ready to commit before making things official. It sounds like you have done that, so best of luck!
Ive been talking to this girl, and she said she likes me back, as in love but she said to give ot a few days, im going on a date with her on friday and dont know how to ask her to be my lover.
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In my experience, you NEED to have that conversation, friend. Like the first commenter said, yeah, you prolly want to until after a few dates to ask her to be your girlfriend, but you also don't want to wait much longer than a few weeks.
One, because you never actually know until you know, she could think you guys are both open and seeing other people, and the longer you wait the more awkward it'll be and the more you'll hurt if you find out she hasn't been/doesn't want to be exclusive. Two, because she'll probably be glad you officially asked. She might even feel hurt if you don't!
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One, because you never actually know until you know, she could think you guys are both open and seeing other people, and the longer you wait the more awkward it'll be and the more you'll hurt if you find out she hasn't been/doesn't want to be exclusive. Two, because she'll probably be glad you officially asked. She might even feel hurt if you don't!
i think i am in the same boat as OP..................tbh i was going to just not officially say anything because i know i'm exclusive and i'm pretty sure she is too, we are together every day, have been dating for 3 weeks, and we are talking about holidays and stuff. is it not safe to assume she is my gf
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