205+ Open-Ended Questions to Get to Know a Girl Better

Trying to learn more about a girl and deepen your connection? Asking open-ended questions is the best way to bond and start an engaging conversation. In this article, we’re providing the ultimate list of fun, interesting, and personal questions to ask a girl, whether you're chatting over text or in person. We also talked to dating experts Lauren Sanders and Laura Bilotta for tips on how to approach touchy topics.

The Best Open-Ended Questions to Ask a Girl

What’s your favorite meme?
What keeps you up at night?
What’s your biggest pet peeve?
What makes you smile on a bad day?
How would you describe me in 3 words?
What’s the funniest thing you believed in as a child?
What’s the most interesting thing you’ve seen or read this week?

Section 1 of 9:

Fun Open-Ended Questions to Ask a Girl

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Break the ice with these fun and easy conversation starters. To start an engaging conversation with a girl, “ask open-ended questions that leave a lot of room for more than just a yes or no answer,” says Bilotta. This is a “fun way to get to know more about someone and will certainly break the ice.”^{[1]
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Expert Source

Laura Bilotta
Dating Coach

Expert Interview} Some topics you can talk about include her personality, hobbies, interests, and tastes:
- What’s your dream job?
- What’s your zodiac sign?
- Who’s your favorite artist?
- What’s your favorite scent?
- Who’s your celebrity crush?
- What’s your ideal breakfast?
- What’s your favorite season?
- What’s your biggest pet peeve?
- What could you write a book on?
- What’s your go-to karaoke song?
- What was your last Netflix binge?
- What’s your favorite book and why?
- What’s one thing on your bucket list?
- What’s your favorite outdoor activity?
- What’s the best character of all time?
- Are you a morning or a night person?
- What does your perfect day look like?
- What’s the best trip you’ve ever taken?
- What’s the first album you ever bought?
- What would your dream house look like?
- What’s something you can’t live without?
- What are 3 things that make you happy?
- What’s your dream vacation destination?
- What’s the first concert you ever went to?
- Which celebrity would play you in a movie?
- Where are your favorite places to hang out?
- What’s the first thing you do in the morning?
- If you could live anywhere in the world, where would you choose?
- If you had to choose one song to describe your life right now, what would it be?

Section 2 of 9:

Romantic Open-Ended Questions to Ask a Girl

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Ask her romantic questions to see if you’re compatible in real life. If you’re trying to see if a girl likes you (or if you’re a good match for her), ask open-ended questions about love and dating. Talk about what you both want out of a relationship, how she copes with conflict, and how she prefers to give and receive love. You can even incorporate hypothetical scenarios and questions about her past crushes to see if you’re her type. By exploring her relationship goals and values, you'll get to know her better and see if she’s the right person for you.
- What’s your usual type?
- What’s your love language?
- What’s your biggest turn-on?
- What does love mean to you?
- What’s your favorite love song?
- What’s your favorite memory of us?
- What’s your favorite thing about me?
- What's your idea of the perfect date?
- What was your first impression of me?
- What traits do you look for in a partner?
- How would you describe me in 3 words?
- What’s the best movie to watch on a date?
- What’s something that reminds you of me?
- What are your green flags in a relationship?
- If you were me for a day, what would you do?
- Do you prefer being single or in a relationship?
- Do you believe in soulmates? Why or why not?
- What are your non-negotiables in a relationship?
- If we had a Netflix show, what would it be called?
- What’s something unique that you find attractive?
- How do you know when you’re really into someone?
- If we formed a band, what kind of music would we make?
- Do you prefer grand romantic gestures or small surprises?
- If we had to move to another country, where would we go?
- What’s the most romantic thing you’ve ever done for someone?
- What’s the first thing that comes to mind when you think of me?

Section 3 of 9:

Interesting Open-Ended Questions to Ask a Girl

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Suggest hypothetical scenarios to save a dying conversation. If your conversation is getting a bit boring, ask a creative “what if” style question to reveal more of her personality. You can preface the question by suggesting a fun game or randomly bringing it up to catch her off guard. Here are some interesting and thought-provoking options to help you get started:
- If you were invisible for a day, what would you do?
- If you were a mad scientist, what would you invent?
- If you could stop time for a year, what would you do?
- If you could master one skill instantly, what would it be?
- If you could time travel, which decade are you going to?
- If you woke up as an animal, what would you want to be?
- If you could play any instrument, what would you choose?
- If you won the lottery, what’s the first thing you would buy?
- If you could live in any fictional world, where are you going?
- If you could stay one age forever, which would you choose?
- If you could eliminate one historical event, what would it be?
- If the floor was lava, how would you get from place to place?
- If you could make any kid’s TV show, what would it be about?
- If you could solve one problem in the world, what would it be?
- If you could only see one color, what color would you choose?
- If you could guest star on any TV show, what would you choose?
- If you were an Olympic athlete, what sport would you compete in?
- If you were given the death penalty, what would your last meal be?
- If you were born 100 years earlier, what would your occupation be?
- If you could master any language instantly, what would you choose?
- If you could only watch one movie for the rest of your life, what would it be?
- If you could only listen to one artist for the rest of your life, who would you pick?
- If you could create your dream band with 5 artists, dead or alive, who would be in it?
- If someone followed you around and narrated your life, who would you want it to be?
- If you could have an unlimited supply of one thing for the rest of your life, what would you choose?

Section 4 of 9:

Funny Open-Ended Questions to Ask a Girl

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Throw out a silly question to bond and make her laugh. Sharing a laugh with someone is proven to strengthen relationships.^{[2]
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Trustworthy Source

Greater Good Magazine
Journal published by UC Berkeley's Greater Good Science Center, which uses scientific research to promote happier living

Go to source} So, come up with an unexpectedly goofy question to get the giggles going. Joking around with a girl is a great way to build rapport, show off your sense of humor, and let her know you’re interested in getting to know her better!
- What’s your most useless skill?
- Which Shrek movie is the best?
- What’s your least favorite scent?
- What’s your biggest irrational fear?
- Who’s the most attractive animated character?
- What’s the best prank you’ve pulled on someone?
- What’s the most embarrassing thing in your closet?
- What’s the dumbest thing you’ve done while drunk?
- What’s the funniest thing you believed in as a child?
- If animals could talk, which one would be the rudest?
- How long could you survive in a zombie apocalypse?
- If you could fight any historical figure, who would it be?
- Do you think a hot dog is a sandwich? Why or why not?
- What’s the most unnecessary white lie you’ve ever told?
- What’s an embarrassing song or band you secretly love?
- What crime would you commit if you could get away with it?
- What’s the best excuse you’ve given to skip school or work?
- What’s one inanimate object you would delete from existence?
- What’s the most savage insult you can come up with on the spot?
- When’s the most inappropriate time you've laughed at something?
- What’s the weirdest or most shocking thing you’ve seen in someone’s house?
- What’s the creepiest thing you could say to a stranger when passing them on the street?

Section 5 of 9:

Open-Ended Questions to Ask a Girl About Family

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Ask about her loved ones to learn more about her upbringing. If you want to learn more about a girl, asking open-ended questions about her family is a great place to start. Family can be a touchy topic for some, so ask her if it’s okay first. You could also frame your questions in a positive way to bring up the topic gently. For example, instead of directly asking if she has a good relationship with her family, you could say, “What’s the coolest thing about your family?”
- How strict are your parents?
- How close are you with your family?
- What’s your earliest family memory?
- What do your parents do for a living?
- Who in your family has the coolest job?
- What 3 words best describe your family?
- What do you think makes a family close?
- How does your family celebrate birthdays?
- What’s your favorite thing about your family?
- What’s your favorite family vacation memory?
- Who do you consider non-blood-related family?
- Do you have any pets? If so, tell me about them.
- What is your favorite thing to do with your family?
- How do you think your family compares to others?
- Who is the most influential person in your family and why?
- What are some traditions that are important to your family?
- What’s one thing you wish your family talked about more often?
- What’s the best piece of advice you’ve received from a family member?
- What is one unique quality that you admire about each person in your family?
- Which family member do you go to when you need to talk through a problem?
- What family traditions do you hope to continue with your own children someday?
- How do you think your relationship with your parents has shaped who you are today?
- What are some important family values that have been passed down through generations?

Section 6 of 9:

Personal Open-Ended Questions to Ask a Girl

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Ask personal questions to deepen your connection with a girl. If you want to connect with a girl on a deeper level, you should “ask about [her] life goals and values,” says Sanders.^{[3]
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Expert Source

Lauren Sanders
Matchmaker & Dating Coach

Expert Interview} Discussing meaningful topics is the best way to build intimacy in any relationship, but if you’re worried about overstepping boundaries, preface by saying it’s totally fine not to answer.
- Who’s your role model?
- What’s your top goal in life?
- Where is your happy place?
- Are you spiritual or religious?
- What’s your earliest memory?
- What are you most grateful for?
- What brings out your inner child?
- How do you feel about marriage?
- What’s your definition of success?
- What makes you smile on a bad day?
- Who would you call in an emergency?
- Where do you see yourself in 5 years?
- What’s your favorite childhood memory?
- What’s your most embarrassing moment?
- How do you know you can trust someone?
- What are 3 things you love about yourself?
- What’s one thing no one knows about you?
- What role do you play in your friend group?
- What’s the scariest thing you’ve ever done?
- What’s the most trouble you’ve ever been in?
- What’s the biggest misconception about you?
- Do you believe in astrology? Why or why not?
- How do you handle conflict in your personal life?
- What’s your favorite thing about your best friend?
- Do you think physical or emotional pain is worse?
- What did you want to be when you were younger?
- What’s the best compliment you’ve ever received?
- What current events or causes are you most passionate about?
- If your life was a book, what’s the title of the chapter you’re in now?

Section 7 of 9:

Serious Open-Ended Questions to Ask a Girl

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Ask deeper questions if a girl has just opened up to you. If a girl has shared something vulnerable with you in a private setting, follow up with a question that moves beyond the surface. Asking about her fears, regrets, and mental health is a great way to grow close to her, but tread carefully since these are serious topics. If she doesn’t feel comfortable, Bilotta says to “respect [her] boundaries and move on to the next question.”^{[4]
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Expert Source

Laura Bilotta
Dating Coach & Matchmaker

Expert Interview}
- What’s your biggest fear?
- What keeps you up at night?
- How do you practice self-care?
- What’s your biggest insecurity?
- When’s the last time you cried?
- What’s holding you back in life?
- Are you missing anyone right now?
- What’s your least favorite emotion?
- When’s the last time you felt alone?
- What does happiness mean to you?
- When do you feel the most beautiful?
- What quality do you value most in a friend?
- Have you had any near-death experiences?
- What’s your relationship to mental health like?
- Are you closer to your mom or your dad? Why?
- What’s one thing you’d change about the world?
- Who in your life deserves the biggest thank you?
- What’s the most important relationship in your life?
- What’s one thing you would change about yourself?
- What’s the hardest truth you’ve had to face this past year?
- Who in your life do you wish you could make amends with?
- What’s one piece of advice you’d give to your younger self?
- What’s the most important life lesson you’ve learned so far?
- What’s the craziest thing you’ve done for someone you love?
- What’s one thing you would do if you knew you could not fail?
- What do most people overestimate or underestimate about you?
- What’s something you’ve tolerated in the past that you no longer have space for?

Section 8 of 9:

Open-Ended Questions to Ask a Girl Over Text

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Share your own response to keep the conversation going over text. If you want to keep a girl engaged over text, ask her an open-ended question, then share your own response so the two of you can learn more about each other. Feel free to send her photos related to your question (and encourage her to do the same) to keep things fun. If you’re grabbing a coffee, for example, you could send a photo of your drink and ask what her go-to order is.
- What’s your life motto?
- What’s your favorite snack?
- What’s your favorite meme?
- What’s your go-to coffee order?
- What emoji reminds you of me?
- What’s your favorite food combo?
- What’s your favorite place to travel?
- What’s your favorite way to unwind?
- What’s your favorite lyrics of all time?
- What’s the best meal you’ve ever had?
- What’s the highlight of your day so far?
- What do you think happens when we die?
- What’s the most-used app on your phone?
- What kind of music do you like listening to?
- How do you usually spend your weekends?
- What’s the last thing you purchased for fun?
- What’s something you’re looking forward to?
- What’s the best concert you’ve ever been to?
- What’s the coolest thing you’ve learned lately?
- What’s something you’ve always wanted to learn or try?
- If you could change your name, what would you choose?
- What’s something you wish would go out of style forever?
- What’s the weirdest thing that has happened to you this week?
- What movie did you watch over and over when you were a kid?
- What’s the most interesting thing you’ve seen or read this week?

Section 9 of 9:

The Importance of Asking Deep Questions

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Asking deep questions can help you build a stronger connection with a girl. When you ask thoughtful, open-ended questions that move beyond the surface, it shows you’re interested in learning about someone’s thoughts, ideas, interests, goals, and aspirations in life. This leads to deeper understanding and greater emotional intimacy, which can help the two of you feel more connected. Here are some other benefits of asking deep and meaningful questions:^{[5]
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Research source}
- Trust: When someone shares their personal experiences or opinions about a meaningful topic, it fosters a stronger sense of connection, trust, and mutual respect.
- Dopamine: Studies show that having healthy, trusting conversations can trigger higher levels of dopamine, oxytocin, endorphins, and other biochemicals that make you feel good.^{[6]
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  Research source}
- Commitment: Trying to get a better understanding of someone’s beliefs, dreams, and fears can make them feel more loved and valued in a relationship.
- Vulnerability: Deep and personal questions prompt both parties to open up and share information about themselves, which can lead to more genuine conversations.
- Emotional intimacy: When someone shares personal details, they are placing trust in the other person, which can strengthen the bond and connection between them.